Weird News

Richard K Niner · Postby **Richard K Niner** » Thu Jan 20, 2005 11:31 pm

<table border='0' align='center' width='95%' ><tr><td class='quotetop'>Quote: </td></tr><tr><td class='quotebody'> NBA game delayed after seeing-eye dog relieved itself on the court Canadian Press January 20, 2005 ORLANDO, Fla. (AP) - Who didn't let the dog out? A stink was raised during halftime of the Detroit Pistons-Orlando Magic NBA game on Tuesday night when the start of the second half was delayed by three minutes after a seeing-eye dog relieved itself on the court. The dog was with a charity organization, Canine Companions for Independence, that was receiving a $10,000 US donation from the Orlando Magic Youth Foundation. When the Pistons came out for warmups, Rasheed Wallace walked up to the lane where the excrement had fallen, stopped and stared in disbelief. His teammates were just as confused before wide smiles broke out. A custodian was enlisted to scoop up the mess and wipe up the remains with cleaner, a mop and towels. The Canadian Press 2005</td></tr></table>  Aw, poop! <img src='http://definecynical.mancubus.net/forum ... /blink.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='blink.gif' />

Richard K Niner · Postby **Richard K Niner** » Thu Jan 20, 2005 11:35 pm

<table border='0' align='center' width='95%' ><tr><td class='quotetop'>Quote: </td></tr><tr><td class='quotebody'> Eeeeeeeewwwwwwww! Wed Jan 19, 2005 8:39 AM ET LONDON (Reuters) - The makers of the handy spray lubricant WD-40 proudly list 2,000 uses for their product, from unsticking rusty screws or squeaky bicycle chains to polishing frying pans. But British police have found another -- keeping the public from snorting cocaine off toilet lids in bars. Police in the English city of Bristol said Tuesday they have been advising pub and nightclub owners to spray the colorless lubricant on toilet seats and other flat surfaces in the lavatory that customers often use to snort drugs. Apparently, cocaine and spray lube don't mix. "A chemical reaction takes place with the cocaine that causes it to congeal and become a mess so it's unusable," a police spokesman said. "It's one very small, very cheap way in which you can very seriously restrict the amount of drug use in your premises." Constable Graham Pease, a liquor licensing officer, said he discovered the trick a few years ago while discussing with pub owners how to reduce drug use on their premises. "We were discussing with licensees how we could keep cocaine from being snorted from surfaces," he told Reuters. "It came about that we wanted to spray something on surfaces that cocaine would stick to. And somebody mentioned WD-40." The new use seems to have taken its makers by surprise. "Its not meant to be ingested. It says so clearly on the can so we wouldn't advocate it for that purpose. But people will use it how they will," said a British spokeswoman for the San Diego, Calif-based WD-40 Co. At Bar Excellence in Bristol, deputy manager Julian Barraud said it was part of the drug fighting arsenal. "It does work. It's one of the tricks that we've got to try and tackle the problem," he said. Reuters 2005. All Rights Reserved. </td></tr></table>  So, does that make 2001 uses?

VisibilityMissing · Postby **VisibilityMissing** » Fri Jan 21, 2005 4:03 am

Ouch!! Don't worry folks, he can no longer reproduce.  <table border='0' align='center' width='95%' ><tr><td class='quotetop'>Quote: </td></tr><tr><td class='quotebody'> Jan 20, 4:06 PM EST Nev. Man Castrates Himself to Lower Libido RENO, Nev. (AP) -- A 50-year-old Reno man who was hospitalized after he castrated himself told police he learned of the procedure on the Internet and did so to lower his libido. The man, whose name was not released, called 911 at about 1:30 a.m. Monday and asked for help because he could not stop the bleeding from a self-castration operation, police said. Reno police and medics responded to the man's home and he was taken by ambulance to the hospital. Washoe Medical Center officials cited privacy issues on why they could not release any information on the man, including his condition. But police said hospital officials confirmed Wednesday the man successfully castrated himself. "The man obviously needs some sort of counseling," Reno police Lt. Ron Donnelly told the Reno Gazette-Journal. Advertisement --- Information from: Reno Gazette-Journal, <a href='http://www.rgj.com' target='_blank'>http://www.rgj.com</a> 2005 The Associated Press.</td></tr></table>

Richard K Niner · Postby **Richard K Niner** » Fri Jan 21, 2005 11:47 am

Sounds like a candidate for a Darwin award, there.

Gizensha · Postby **Gizensha** » Fri Jan 21, 2005 4:39 pm

<table border='0' align='center' width='95%' ><tr><td class='quotetop'>Quote: (Richard K Niner @ Jan 20 2005, 11:35 PM)</td></tr><tr><td class='quotebody'>  <table border='0' align='center' width='95%' ><tr><td class='quotetop'>Quote: </td></tr><tr><td class='quotebody'> Eeeeeeeewwwwwwww! Wed Jan 19, 2005 8:39 AM ET LONDON (Reuters) - The makers of the handy spray lubricant WD-40 proudly list 2,000 uses for their product, from unsticking rusty screws or squeaky bicycle chains to polishing frying pans. But British police have found another -- keeping the public from snorting cocaine off toilet lids in bars. Police in the English city of Bristol said Tuesday they have been advising pub and nightclub owners to spray the colorless lubricant on toilet seats and other flat surfaces in the lavatory that customers often use to snort drugs. Apparently, cocaine and spray lube don't mix. "A chemical reaction takes place with the cocaine that causes it to congeal and become a mess so it's unusable," a police spokesman said. "It's one very small, very cheap way in which you can very seriously restrict the amount of drug use in your premises." Constable Graham Pease, a liquor licensing officer, said he discovered the trick a few years ago while discussing with pub owners how to reduce drug use on their premises. "We were discussing with licensees how we could keep cocaine from being snorted from surfaces," he told Reuters. "It came about that we wanted to spray something on surfaces that cocaine would stick to. And somebody mentioned WD-40." The new use seems to have taken its makers by surprise. "Its not meant to be ingested. It says so clearly on the can so we wouldn't advocate it for that purpose. But people will use it how they will," said a British spokeswoman for the San Diego, Calif-based WD-40 Co. At Bar Excellence in Bristol, deputy manager Julian Barraud said it was part of the drug fighting arsenal. "It does work. It's one of the tricks that we've got to try and tackle the problem," he said. Reuters 2005. All Rights Reserved. </td></tr></table>  So, does that make 2001 uses?</td></tr></table>  And this would obviously result in law-suits due to slipping off of the toilette seat and cracking the skull open. See, measures to prevent drug use are all very well and good, as long as they don't effect everday activity like, for example, using the bathroom. .... And ugh, can you imagine using the toilette seat after some had congelated onto it?  <table border='0' align='center' width='95%' ><tr><td class='quotetop'>Quote: (Richard K Niner)</td></tr><tr><td class='quotebody'> Sounds like a candidate for a Darwin award, there.</td></tr></table>  Nah, candidate for an honorable mention, you have to actually die to get the full award.

IHateUsernames · Postby **IHateUsernames** » Fri Jan 21, 2005 5:05 pm

<table border='0' align='center' width='95%' ><tr><td class='quotetop'>Quote: (Gizensha @ Jan 21 2005, 05:39 PM)</td></tr><tr><td class='quotebody'>  <table border='0' align='center' width='95%' ><tr><td class='quotetop'>Quote: (Richard K Niner)</td></tr><tr><td class='quotebody'> Sounds like a candidate for a Darwin award, there.</td></tr></table>  Nah, candidate for an honorable mention, you have to actually die to get the full award.  </td></tr></table>  No, I think you just have to be unable to reproduce.

Ozymandias · Postby **Ozymandias** » Fri Jan 21, 2005 6:15 pm

Yeah, sterilising yourself unintentionally counts

Gizensha · Postby **Gizensha** » Fri Jan 21, 2005 6:59 pm

<table border='0' align='center' width='95%' ><tr><td class='quotetop'>Quote: (Ozymandias @ Jan 21 2005, 06:15 PM)</td></tr><tr><td class='quotebody'> Yeah, sterilising yourself unintentionally counts  </td></tr></table>  Oh ok. Next topic - <a href='http://www.telegraphindia.com/1050120/a ... 276016.asp' target='_blank'>Pokemon causes Cancer</a> Probably the most unfortunate coincidence in the history of medical science, though the actual news is great but... I just can't take it seriously because of the naming involved.

Henohenomoheji · Postby **Henohenomoheji** » Fri Jan 21, 2005 9:59 pm

<table border='0' align='center' width='95%' ><tr><td class='quotetop'>Quote: (VisibilityMissing @ Jan 21 2005, 02:03 PM)</td></tr><tr><td class='quotebody'> Ouch!! Don't worry folks, he can no longer reproduce.  <table border='0' align='center' width='95%' ><tr><td class='quotetop'>Quote: </td></tr><tr><td class='quotebody'> Jan 20, 4:06 PM EST Nev. Man Castrates Himself to Lower Libido RENO, Nev. (AP) -- A 50-year-old Reno man who was hospitalized after he castrated himself told police he learned of the procedure on the Internet and did so to lower his libido. The man, whose name was not released, called 911 at about 1:30 a.m. Monday and asked for help because he could not stop the bleeding from a self-castration operation, police said. Reno police and medics responded to the man's home and he was taken by ambulance to the hospital. Washoe Medical Center officials cited privacy issues on why they could not release any information on the man, including his condition. But police said hospital officials confirmed Wednesday the man successfully castrated himself. "The man obviously needs some sort of counseling," Reno police Lt. Ron Donnelly told the Reno Gazette-Journal. Advertisement --- Information from: Reno Gazette-Journal, <a href='http://www.rgj.com' target='_blank'>http://www.rgj.com</a> 2005 The Associated Press.</td></tr></table>  </td></tr></table>  Now why wasn't this on Reno 911? Or was it and I never saw it because I never get the chance to watch that show? ...And what's a Darwin?

VisibilityMissing · Postby **VisibilityMissing** » Fri Jan 21, 2005 10:54 pm

Ah, glad you asked. Can't have too many links to the Darwin Awards here! <a href='http://www.darwinawards.com/' target='_blank'>Clicky</a> And, yes, he is definitely a Darwin Award candidate. But, I think this one's been done more gloriously before.

VisibilityMissing · Postby **VisibilityMissing** » Sun Jan 23, 2005 2:48 am

See all the problems pants cause . . . <img src='http://definecynical.mancubus.net/forum ... /smile.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='smile.gif' />  <table border='0' align='center' width='95%' ><tr><td class='quotetop'>Quote: </td></tr><tr><td class='quotebody'> Jan 22, 8:13 PM EST Tenn. 'Demon Jeans' Assault Case Dismissed BRISTOL, Tenn. (AP) -- A Sullivan County judge threw out a case between a preacher and three feuding sisters and warned them to leave one another alone. All four faced assault charges that stemmed from a family scuffle and claims of being possessed by demons. "This is the most ridiculous case I have ever seen in the court system," General Sessions Judge Bill Watson said Friday. "You people should be ashamed." Reba Storey, 46, alleged the Rev. Clarence "June" Love, 83, called her demon-possessed and twisted her arm when he threw her out of church Jan. 9. Storey and her sister Mary Steele, 64, showed up a the Assemblies of Jesus Church wearing blue jeans to see their 88-year-old mother, Maude Yates. The church that has a total of four members forbids women to wear pants. "He said, 'You're not wearing pants in my church, you demon,'" Storey said. "I said, 'I'm so glad I serve a God who can work through my pants.'" Love's girlfriend and a sister to the two women, 68-year-old Rosa Harrison, said the women grabbed their mother, shoved everyone else out of the way and tried to carry her out the door. "I asked them to leave," Love said. "They told me to shut my mouth. God knows my heart. I've never been cruel to no woman. They're just troublemakers." The judge ordered the family members to stay away from each other and set a court hearing for next year. "It's a sad day when you have people go in a place of worship and do what was done in this case," Watson said. "I hope I never see a case like this come before this court again." "Amen!" the preacher said. Love said he plans to return to his church, where he says the sisters have driven away the congregation. The preacher wouldn't say whether he still thought Storey was possessed. "All this has hurt the church real bad," he said. Storey said she plans to continue her case in civil court. "Do I look like I have a demon?" she said. "That's defamation of character." --- Information from: Bristol Herald Courier, <a href='http://www.bristolnews.com' target='_blank'>http://www.bristolnews.com</a> 2005 The Associated Press.</td></tr></table>

Gizensha · Postby **Gizensha** » Mon Jan 24, 2005 12:10 am

<table border='0' align='center' width='95%' ><tr><td class='quotetop'>Quote: (VisibilityMissing @ Jan 23 2005, 02:48 AM)</td></tr><tr><td class='quotebody'>  <table border='0' align='center' width='95%' ><tr><td class='quotetop'>Quote: </td></tr><tr><td class='quotebody'> "He said, 'You're not wearing pants in my church, you demon,'" Storey said. "I said, 'I'm so glad I serve a God who can work through my pants.'"</td></tr></table>   </td></tr></table>  ...This part scares the pants off of me. Now, why the heck would any church ban women from wearing pants, anyway?

VisibilityMissing · Postby **VisibilityMissing** » Mon Jan 24, 2005 12:39 am

Maybe the pastor is a closet nudist? <img src='http://definecynical.mancubus.net/forum ... iggrin.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='biggrin.gif' />

GhostWay · Postby **GhostWay** » Mon Jan 24, 2005 12:45 am

I believe the pastor is conservative as far as dress codes go - essentially, the mindset that women should wear skirts or dresses instead of pants.

Henohenomoheji · Postby **Henohenomoheji** » Mon Jan 24, 2005 12:47 am

<table border='0' align='center' width='95%' ><tr><td class='quotetop'>Quote: (VisibilityMissing @ Jan 23 2005, 12:48 PM)</td></tr><tr><td class='quotebody'>  <table border='0' align='center' width='95%' ><tr><td class='quotetop'>Quote: </td></tr><tr><td class='quotebody'> All four faced</td></tr></table>   </td></tr></table>  All your base. Sorry, just had to notice that. Now, What About Pants? I had a remark about the media history of churches, but in the intrest of... uh... something, yes, that's it, Something!, I refuse to remember it.

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