Story premise (critical eye needed)
Moderator:Æron
Hokay, I'm thinking about drawing a proper comic-book style comic. Now, this might be a few years away, but I want to show you guys the background to the story:
[quote]The year is 2108, and the human race now cohabits the planet with new species of sentient animal life. These “fursâ€
[quote]The year is 2108, and the human race now cohabits the planet with new species of sentient animal life. These “fursâ€
- Tom Flapwell
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intruiging O.o and fascinating. really like the backstory... 

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At the end of the day, when all is said and done, and you've squished an ant... it's time.
^My deviantart, plz take a look and leave a comment
At the end of the day, when all is said and done, and you've squished an ant... it's time.
Wow, quite a story there roo. It is good, I think you got a good idea here. Got some nice elements with a somewhat dark plot.
But as stated earlier I worry about the dates you have set. I think 2012 might be a bit early for this all to start since as stated earlier that is just around the corner. At the same time I can see where you would have a problem pushing the dates too far because you talk of an oil crisis in 2017, and I don't realistically think you should push that back any more. So I am not 100% sure what you want to do there, but I would hate to read this expecting a plague in a year or two.
I don't think you should change this....but from a scientific point of view the idea of a cross wolf, human to create an antibodies is unrealistic. A more realistic cross would be a pig human since pigs immunine systems are very very close to ours. In fact we can thank pigs for being the link between birds and us for many diseases (including almost, if not all, strains of the flu). Again I don't think you should change this, I like a wolf cross a lot better
but I just wanted to let you know that is a flaw in your plot.
For another scientific view….I was trying to think what strain of the small pox could be linked between humans and canines. The best I can come up with is a mutated form of “adenovirus type-1 (CAV-1)â€
But as stated earlier I worry about the dates you have set. I think 2012 might be a bit early for this all to start since as stated earlier that is just around the corner. At the same time I can see where you would have a problem pushing the dates too far because you talk of an oil crisis in 2017, and I don't realistically think you should push that back any more. So I am not 100% sure what you want to do there, but I would hate to read this expecting a plague in a year or two.
I don't think you should change this....but from a scientific point of view the idea of a cross wolf, human to create an antibodies is unrealistic. A more realistic cross would be a pig human since pigs immunine systems are very very close to ours. In fact we can thank pigs for being the link between birds and us for many diseases (including almost, if not all, strains of the flu). Again I don't think you should change this, I like a wolf cross a lot better

For another scientific view….I was trying to think what strain of the small pox could be linked between humans and canines. The best I can come up with is a mutated form of “adenovirus type-1 (CAV-1)â€
Hokay;
Yeah, I didn't think about the years. I might push them all back 10 or 15 more. I'm trying to get the 2100 to look a little like 2000, just with better gadgets. I want a very dystopian society, as one thing that always annoys me about films set in the future is that everything is shiney. I mean, people will still drive beaten up vehicles, and the "war" and gives me this excuse.
As for the virus Jent, I'm thinking now of making it the result of a terrorist dirty bomb. This is great, as I can say it;s a weaponised virus, therefore engineered to kill...that means I can totally make one up like 24 did
All this history would be cleared up in the prologue, before the story starts. The story itself is mostly about alien abduction, and conspiracy, that just happens to be set in the 2100s.
I reckon it'll take about 2.5 years to finish it if I do a page a week.
Also, I had a really cool idea of treating it sort of like a film. The characters would be "played" by peoples characters. This is really so I can be in it, but I've also written a part with one of my friend's characters in mind. As it is like a film, the characters will act differently to how they are, but I think it'd b quite cool
Yeah, I didn't think about the years. I might push them all back 10 or 15 more. I'm trying to get the 2100 to look a little like 2000, just with better gadgets. I want a very dystopian society, as one thing that always annoys me about films set in the future is that everything is shiney. I mean, people will still drive beaten up vehicles, and the "war" and gives me this excuse.
As for the virus Jent, I'm thinking now of making it the result of a terrorist dirty bomb. This is great, as I can say it;s a weaponised virus, therefore engineered to kill...that means I can totally make one up like 24 did

All this history would be cleared up in the prologue, before the story starts. The story itself is mostly about alien abduction, and conspiracy, that just happens to be set in the 2100s.
I reckon it'll take about 2.5 years to finish it if I do a page a week.
Also, I had a really cool idea of treating it sort of like a film. The characters would be "played" by peoples characters. This is really so I can be in it, but I've also written a part with one of my friend's characters in mind. As it is like a film, the characters will act differently to how they are, but I think it'd b quite cool

I hate to dwell on the virus because I am sure you don't want to focus on all this science shit. But incase you, or anyone does care....
If you want to read more about cross-species virus transmition here is a page with a lot of detailed information. It is multiple pages, just hit next at the bottom to keep reading....
http://www.niaid.nih.gov/dait/cross-species/page1.htm
And this is a bit off topic but I thought it was intresting. It talks about canines being asymptomatic carriers of ebola virus....
http://www.cdc.gov/ncidod/EID/vol11no03/04-0981.htm
Obviously something like that would never work for your story though, because it would end up killing all the non-furs....
If you want to read more about cross-species virus transmition here is a page with a lot of detailed information. It is multiple pages, just hit next at the bottom to keep reading....
http://www.niaid.nih.gov/dait/cross-species/page1.htm
And this is a bit off topic but I thought it was intresting. It talks about canines being asymptomatic carriers of ebola virus....
http://www.cdc.gov/ncidod/EID/vol11no03/04-0981.htm
Obviously something like that would never work for your story though, because it would end up killing all the non-furs....
- Tabris_The_17th
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I must say it sounds like a really well thought out idea. Everyone makes a good point about the dates. When I first started to read it, I was afraid you were going to get too clichéd. However, I think you're keeping it quite fresh enough with some interesting ideas. I could see this as an enjoyable read.
Especially the aspect of having people's characters in it. That sounds very cool!
Especially the aspect of having people's characters in it. That sounds very cool!

www.aiacrowd.com- Now updating every Tuesday and Friday!
"Like a post modern Peanuts with cat eared girls...kinda"
Sounds interesting. Definately potential there, like Tabris said, try to avoid being to generic if possible.
And jent also has a point. Going into massive scientific detail isn't necessary, but making it believable will make the entire thing better.
My ideas: First, you may have to come up with a modified, or different art style for this.
I can't really see WFTT type strips working effectively.
It may be a bit hard, but you're an artist, I'm sure you can pull it off. Play around with different realistic type styles, and give the strips a darker aura.
Other than that, I'd need more info, the backstory is cool, but there are a couple of things I would change, but I'll get back to that when I have more time.
Until then...UAN Prevails.
And jent also has a point. Going into massive scientific detail isn't necessary, but making it believable will make the entire thing better.
My ideas: First, you may have to come up with a modified, or different art style for this.
I can't really see WFTT type strips working effectively.
It may be a bit hard, but you're an artist, I'm sure you can pull it off. Play around with different realistic type styles, and give the strips a darker aura.
Other than that, I'd need more info, the backstory is cool, but there are a couple of things I would change, but I'll get back to that when I have more time.
Until then...UAN Prevails.

- Bocaj Claw
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- Tabris_The_17th
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"Bocaj Claw 3: Judgement Post"Sounds good to me but I reserve my judgement. That way I'll have plenty of judgement when a new person joins the forums.

www.aiacrowd.com- Now updating every Tuesday and Friday!
"Like a post modern Peanuts with cat eared girls...kinda"
- Tabris_The_17th
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Definitely.I think a more mature look than your current comic art is needed for this.

www.aiacrowd.com- Now updating every Tuesday and Friday!
"Like a post modern Peanuts with cat eared girls...kinda"
Mmm, I was going to try and "adultise" my style a little, but it still looks a bit cartoonish. I'm going to try and make it black and white, but use lighting effects heavily.
I'll upload some pics of the characters I've idealised so far.
Of course, my character is in it already
but I need some more. Also, in the story, Rufus has a sister whos a bit of a goth (well, she's a suicide girl). As well as them, there's the main character (a coyote) and two main human characters.
Ok, here's the blurb, or premise, of the actual "story" story...so to type.
I'll upload some pics of the characters I've idealised so far.
Of course, my character is in it already

Don't worry, the UFO plot ties into the backstory quite "neatly".I'm more interested in the pre - u.f.o. part, even though I realise that's all going to be the prologue.
Ok, here's the blurb, or premise, of the actual "story" story...so to type.
Ray is an ordinary coyote who gets abducted by aliens on his way home from college. His friends think he’s nuts over the next few months as the aliens return time and time again, each time leaving him with nothing but his words.
Desperate, he turns to the only fur that is crazy enough to believe him; Kerry Danziger. Kerry is in Ray’s year at Uni, and overhears Ray have an argument with his friend about being abducted. She talks to him, and convinces him to meet her older brother Rufus, who runs a small group of UFO believers called “The Occupantsâ€
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