Shyness, RL Vs. The Internet

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Niko123000
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Shyness, RL Vs. The Internet

Postby Niko123000 » Mon Aug 28, 2006 9:55 am

I Just need to discuss this for some reason... I don't know why... I just do...

As humans, we are naturally curious creatures, but we also have the Shyness quality. Shyness has diffrent levels for everbody, for somepeople they could walk straight up to someone and be "HI! WHAT'S YOUR NAME????" and for others, they will become antisocial because of their shyness. but then something else comes up, the ability to stay anonymous with the internet and other various mediaums and tools.

I'm going to use me gfor an example to deminstrate my point. Normally, in RL, I ahve a close cirle of friends I hang out with, and I have trouble meeting new people. usually someone would have to come up to me and start the conversation unless i am in need of something. Anyof you that know my AIM or YIM screen name, know that I will RARELY strike up a conversation on my own. usually you will need to IM me first before I will talk.

But here's anbothe rthing, for those that I know, the say I can become a real Chatterbox at times. I could talk and talk for hours at a time with someone I knew as a friend. it's odd really. I'm shy at first, but once I get to know someone, I find it incredably easy to talk to. (might also be one of the reasons I've been having trouble getting a girlfriend.)

But here's the real zinger, on the Internet, a place where I feel I can talk safely without someone knowing who I am, no matter how perverted it sounds, it makes sense if you think about it. Now adays your pretty much safe being on the web. You can talk to someone and not know what they look like or much about them, but you can still talk to them. It's like all the rules of Shyness just sprout wings and fly out the door. I'm able to join forums and 9usually) be a very active member, and I can anonymous, and yet still have a good conversation.

But then there's one more thing that makes me think. People who wear full body suits, Like fursuiters and Mascots, they can go crazy and wild, and could act completely the opposite of who they really are, and it's all because their face is hidden behind a mask. they could be someone you'd bnever expect to act like that. you could find a fursuiter dancing to "Everytime we Touch" and then realize the Fursuiter is actually a goth. I've heard that once your in one of the suits, it's like all your worries are gone bacause nobody could recognize you (unless you jsut HAPPEN to have a very distinct fursona that anyone you've shown to would recognize you on the spot once they saw you.)

Anyway, what I'm saying is, what is your take on this, and how shy are you in RL. I know for a fact that if I went to an Anthrocon knowing any of you were gonna be there, I'd still feel pretty shy and probably just look in Artist's Alley. But what about you?
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Tom Flapwell
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Postby Tom Flapwell » Mon Aug 28, 2006 2:45 pm

Hm, I think I'd be more self-conscious inside a costume of any kind than out. But aside from that, I empathize.

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Postby Rooster » Mon Aug 28, 2006 3:27 pm

I'm usually pretty shy and retiring to people I don't know too well, and unless I have to, I won't talk to them.

However, that's where my good friend Mr. Beer comes in :wag:

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Postby Tavis » Mon Aug 28, 2006 8:16 pm

I'm not quite sure how my shyness would be in one place versus another, but I think folks online get a much different view than they would offline.... or maybe not. I think I manage to maintain a consistent view between them both, but the closeness of a relationship can change things. Really good friends would know more about me than the average person, and that applies offline as well as online. I'd say the only difference is some get to see me in person, and some have to settle for my words or drawings in its place.

It had been enough for me to ask philosphically, which one is real, what people see in person or what they see when I write? Both, and neither; they're merely a different cross section of the same source, like how the cross section of a cube could be a triangle, a square, or a hexagon depending on where you slice it.

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Postby Dr. Doog » Mon Aug 28, 2006 9:41 pm

Eh, I think of myself as pretty introverted but most of my friends would probably say I'm an extrovert. I like to sit there and listen to people talk more often than talk myself, but then I also love to be the center of attention and talk a lot. That is, I feel a lot less interactive than I am. While I'm friendly and talk to pretty much anybody, it rarely goes beyond the surface when it comes to friendships.
I'd have to say that the people I meet on the internet are the people I wish I knew in real life, and that not a single on of them is like my friends on the internet.
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Postby baloki » Mon Aug 28, 2006 9:54 pm

Theres an internet, is it used to catch fishies?
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Postby Miles E Traysandor » Mon Aug 28, 2006 10:52 pm

For me, I'm a lot more open on the Internet than I could ever be IRL, which is a bit odd, because Miles E. Traysandor is the closest approximation of the actual user behind the computer, there isn't very much that I would do that my fursona wouldn't, and vice-versa.

[Note: Pouncing doesn't count, because while it's all friendly online, it's probably very painful in real life]

My own personal forgone conclusion: If you like my online self [As a friend of course since I don't have an online relationship =p], then there's a pretty good chance we would get along pretty good in the real world too.

that is all for now.
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Postby Dr. Doog » Tue Aug 29, 2006 12:15 am

I don't have an online relationship =p
Gee, thanks for breaking up with me in a message board :?
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Postby Arloest » Tue Aug 29, 2006 12:24 am

I
However, that's where my good friend Mr. Beer comes in :wag:
Absolutely classic.

And I basically agree with everything Niko said.
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Postby Tabris_The_17th » Tue Aug 29, 2006 2:10 am

You're not alone Niko my friend. Your description of yourself basically describes my sense of shyness perfectly. A lot of the time it REALLY kind of sucks, doesn't it?
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Postby johndoe0028 » Tue Aug 29, 2006 4:13 am

People probably think I'm crazy, and popular or something.
(Like my running sit-down, Classic :P)

But it's all because no one, absolutely NO ONE really knows who I am at school...save about 10-15 people.

I'm not too shy, because the first time I see most people, it'll also be the last. Oddly enough, I get more shy when it's forced conversation. (Like "Hey, come meet my new friend!"). Just 'cause I might meet that person again.

Basically, most everyone I meet will forget about me, so I can do whatever I want (I feel).

I hope that response didn't have too many parentheses. :P

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Postby Bocaj Claw » Tue Aug 29, 2006 2:19 pm

On a possibly tangential note, I used to be a lot more introverted in real life and extroverted online. Over time my RL personality has begun to match my internet one, at least in terms of introversion/extroversion.

So I say phah to anybody who says that talking on the internet makes people more antisocial.
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Postby Holyman83 » Wed Aug 30, 2006 12:35 am

I tend to be shy in RL more than online but, it also depends on if I'm comfortable with were I am.
for example: At school I know I can trust the people here so I'm not as shy as I would be to some one at say Wal-Mart or something.
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Blue Blur
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Postby Blue Blur » Wed Aug 30, 2006 4:22 am

You would immediately recognize me in real life as I'm insane. Totally, completely, and utterly insane!

See, this fish even agrees with me! *Pulls out a trout*

Anyway, I'm certainly no more or less shy on or off line, though I tend to behave...



Usually... :wink:
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Postby Caoimhin » Thu Sep 21, 2006 2:04 am

Yeah, I can be a REALlY talkative too in RL, and I can sympathize with much of that kind of shyness.


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