Identity Issues...

[Moddex]

Well, lately I've been having some weird thoughts going about my mind. In a lot of ways, I relate to Dana's situation. I myself have been mistake as female on more than a common occasion. At this point, I'm unsure what I can do about my androgynous appearance. While I've been here, I wonder how many have mistaken me for being female as well. Just curious. Most of you will probably answer male, but it's funny how different people are in person.

I think the real case is whether I'm comfortable with the fact of my gender bender looks and appeal, or if I wish I looked either strongly one way or another. The whole thing came up after I had finished the recent sketch coloring and I found myself wishing I could look like that. I know, it's either odd, or even, perhaps gay in someway to some folk, but I assure you, I've never had an attraction for either party. The only thing is thatr I wish I could look one gender or the other. I'm not sure which one I'm more comfortable with though, which makes me feel more confused... Can someone relate to me or give advice? I feel lost...

[Niko123000]

Well I had a strong feeling that you were a guy before I saw you with the Amanda av on every board, but I think Seth Chronicle on Zenith Project calling you Dave locked it that you were a guy. I wouldn't know about your Identity Crisis right now, the closet I can relate is My orientation. (yes I'm still unsure)

If I had your situation though, I might try doing stuff that could seem Unisex, but are usually rare, Like letting your hair grow out long, which CAN be done by guys, as proved by most finnian bands. It might make you seem Emo, but if it's the closest you can get before trying the big leap, then at least you'll have some experiance.

I hope I was SOME help.

[Moddex]

Thanks, Aaron. Damn, that old name though... I left that identity years ago and never looked back. I already am growning my hair out though and have done as much unisex things as possible to my image to better fit in, but it seems to add a fog to the already blurred line.

[CodeCat]

Hmm, well for some reason I actually like a somewhat androgynous look. Not sure if I have one, but I would like it, or at least not mind it. My hair's pretty long, and I enjoy it like this. I don't really see myself on one side or another, and I don't see a problem with femininity. Although I am straight and happy with who I am. I don't feel like changing to the other side just to feel better, because with my way of thinking I can be both, in my own way.

I guess you should just go for what you feel comfortable with. But like I said, nobody is forcing you to actually 'pick sides'. It's not that sharply defined as some people might make you believe.

[Moddex]

I know, and I've been living with the look since early childhood. I just feel gender confused is all and I feel I lack definition in those terms. I guess I sort of imagine myself as the opposite sex often enough to where it's confused my whole thinking whether or not I should be male or female. What's more, I feel scared admitting the thought with those I live with. After all, I have no idea how my parents would feel, having a son who thinks he's a woman at times. Then of course, I'll have to live with them either being accepting and comforting, or live within the shallows of my room in solitude and fear.

[Dr. Doog]

but are usually rare, Like letting your hair grow out long, which CAN be done by guys, as proved by most finnian bands. It might make you seem Emo

wtf, man. I don't mean to hijack this thread but this isn't exactly rare or emo.

As for your gender, I can't say that I know anything on this subject to offer, but perhaps on the inside you've no real gender and can't comprehend how that could work, which leads you to this confusion?

[Moddex]

Hmm, Sounds like a feasible idea. But I've never had much of a hard time understanding simple things. Maybe I'm just... Wishing I was female..? Oh man, now I'm really confused...

[Tum0spoo]

My opinion, whatever happens happens. Life is too short to dwell on little things like this. If you want to look mor feminine go for it! Do what you feel is right and hell to the rest of the world! (pardon my language)

It take great courage to do what you think is right.
No matter your choices, good friends will always stick with you. Good luck.

[Niko123000]

but are usually rare, Like letting your hair grow out long, which CAN be done by guys, as proved by most finnian bands. It might make you seem Emo

wtf, man. I don't mean to hijack this thread but this isn't exactly rare or emo.

That's not the length I meant, I meant more like the following: ((The Guys specifically, there's only one girl))

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/e ... ietala.jpg
http://www.heavymetalonline.co.uk/acata ... h_Band.jpg
http://www.truemetal.org/MEHTUL-heart/nightwish.jpg

[Moddex]

My opinion, whatever happens happens. Life is too short to dwell on little things like this. If you want to look mor feminine go for it! Do what you feel is right and hell to the rest of the world! (pardon my language)

It take great courage to do what you think is right.
No matter your choices, good friends will always stick with you. Good luck.

Thank you, Tum0... I'm just scared to admit something like this to my family... If they aren't accepting, I'll have to regret it for the rest of their lives, perhaps mine... I find that my friends throughout the net have become my surrogate family and givin my social contact, I feel comfortable explaining this to everyone. I don't, however, feel the same comfortability with my real family.

[Tum0spoo]

One thing to remember, it's going to be akward no matter how many times you run it through your head. Nothing ever goes as planned, so don't stress over it to badly. Also remember that although it's important to talk to your familly about how you feel, it's not like the world is going to change for you. You don't have to join any movements or sign any papers. If others look unto you and wonder why you're different, let them wonder. there's no need to explain to seek everyone's acceptance. only those important to you. I can completely relate to how you feel. Recently I've come across feelings within myself about my orientation. I haven't told my folks or many of my friends because I see it as my own choice. You don't need othe people's permission to follow your heart.

[Moddex]

Gosh... I hope I'm not sounding like Dana too much. I don't want to sound like an attention whore... That'd be selfish. Anyway, thanks everyone. I feel more comfortable when I can express myself to my friends.

[Niko123000]

Gosh... I hope I'm not sounding like Dana too much. I don't want to sound like an attention whore... That'd be selfish. Anyway, thanks everyone. I feel more comfortable when I can express myself to my friends.

Were here for ya. As far as I know, It's very rare to find someone on the net that'd be against this. And when it comes to your family, Tum0 has a point, and I know it can be hard to relaes yourself in the real world. I myself have only fessed up to only two of my frinds when it comes to my orientation, and they have promised to keep their Megaphone mouths shut about it until I feel ready and fully know. Find friends like that and have them help you, I Wouldn't know about your family so I can't say for sure they'd acept it at first.

and I also noticed you replied using my Real name, which for some reason, felt... better... I don't know... Im gonna need to think about some stuff myself... But good luck with your situation anyway.

[Moddex]

I left behind my old identity once I became apart of the internet. Overtime, I'm nothing like the same person a year before.

[Tum0spoo]

I left behind my old identity once I became apart of the internet. Overtime, I'm nothing like the same person a year before.

Just don't end up being a giant TRON parody.