who is marty meme?
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Bocaj Claw
- Posts:8523
- Joined:Mon Apr 25, 2005 11:31 am
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81 FUN FACTOIDS ABOUT MARTY MEME
for reporters only
All guaranteed to be 100% true, or double your I.Q. back!
* Marty Meme thinks tomatoes are still poisonous.
* Marty Meme once sabotaged "Mr. Rogers' Neighborhood" by hijacking the trolley to Cuba.
* Marty Meme cures pattern baldness, but causes random baldness.
* If Marty Meme ever dies, he will be interred in Grant's Tomb.
* Marty Meme is the voice of Duke Nukem 3D. He was paid $1,000,000,000 to record lines like "Hail to the king, babby!" and "Your face, your ass, what's the difference?" and the one Duke only says at the end of the last level, "I wet 'em!"
* Marty Meme can fit two billiard balls in his mouth and still sing "Goldfinger" beautifully.
* Marty Meme was the one who told Chuck Jones, "You know, it would be funny if you changed him from a golf-playing frog to a singing, dancing frog."
* Marty Meme's Personal Identification Number is 1.
* Mosquitoes never bite Marty Meme.
* Marty Meme made his fortune in the seventies by inventing a handheld game that could play tic-tac-toe. It used a 2x2 grid of LEDs, and sold for $99.98. It could reliably beat any human being, although it took a minute to compute each move.
* Marty Meme's favorite NASA mission: Apollo 44D.
* Marty Meme was on "Star Trek" once as one of the evil space children. He's the one who's happy to be given _vanilla_ ice cream.
* Marty Meme lives in a one-room apartment with 450 cats, due to a wacky proviso in his eccentric uncle's will. Also it's haunted, or at least the will says so.
* Marty Meme was once kissed by Barbara Bain. He reported it to the police once he got off the subway.
* The Berlin Wall fell because Marty Meme accidentally broke it.
* Marty Meme buys all his food at K-Mart.
* Marty Meme likes pretzels that are stamped out and only look twisted.
* Marty Meme has no navel.
* Marty Meme inspired Pee-wee Herman... twice!
* Marty Meme can divide by 22 in his head.
* Marty Meme not only won World War III, he single-handedly covered it up!
* Marty Meme can type 120 factoids per minute.
* Marty Meme found babby Spot in a walnut.
* Marty Meme has ten toes. In a jar.
* Marty Meme once fell out of an airplane, landing on Andy Rooney! Only one of them suffered a brain injury.
* Many nations claim the Moon. Only Marty Meme claims the Moon bit him.
* Marty Meme gets financial advice from the ghost of Abraham Lincoln, who lives in a quarter with George Washington.
* When Marty Meme watches TV, the actors feel an eerie chill.
* Marty Meme is allergic to magma.
* Hanna-Barbera fired Marty Meme for having legs that moved independently.
* Marty Meme doesn't know the meaning of the word "meaning".
* Marty Meme is electromagnetically repulsive.
* Dean Martin only heard of Marty Meme last month.
* Don Martin used Marty Meme as a model for most of his characters.
* Doc Marten doesn't really have a doctorate, because Marty Meme got it instead.
* Dan Marino has never heard of Marty Meme, and never will.
* Marty Meme's favorite movie is "Paddle To The Sea".
* Marty Meme drinks over four thousand gallons of vodka PER CAPITA.
* Marty Meme doesn't catch the flu. He steals it.
* In a secret operation, the government gave Marty Meme one bionic leg, enabling him to run over a hundred miles per hour. The bionic surgery cost $1,000,000 plus $5,000,000 in batteries. Now he can crush tennis balls--without even touching them.
* Marty Meme was the first person to earn a PhD in the womb.
* Marty Meme weighs as much as a barracuda on the Moon.
* Marty Meme lives in a giant motorized Rubik's Cube left over from a World's Fair. His next home will be a giant hollow sphere, which he can roll around by walking up the walls, crushing all the other houses in the neighborhood.
* Marty Meme has had the hiccups for over 500 years!
* Marty Meme owns his own satellite. It was launched by accident and is filled with oatmeal. Watch out!
* Marty Meme keeps his ant farm inside a glass basketball, just for the fun of it. He shoots, he scores!
* Marty Meme's home has a self-destruct circuit.
* Marty Meme made up Albert Einstein.
* Marty Meme owns a tuxedo made of real penguin feathers.
* In Sweden, "Marty Meme" means "God of death" and is a popular brand of children's cigarettes.
* Marty Meme directed "Solar Crisis", starring Charlton Heston and Jack Palance.
* Marty Meme is white on the left side, black on the right side. He fights a never-ending battle with Frank Gorshin.
* Marty Meme has the world's second-largest Johnny Jump-Up!
* Marty Meme invented the Frappuchino by spilling a frappe on his chinos. His dog, Spot, took one lick and was addicted for life!
* Marty Meme's personal computer is a Coleco Adam.
* Marty Meme invented rippled cow chips.
* Marty Meme works out with Joe Piscopo.
* Marty Meme likes things and stuff. Spot likes things but not stuff.
* Marty Meme isn't "funny" funny. He is "not funny" funny.
* Marty Meme sleeps in a hyperbarbaric chamber.
* If Marty Meme were a fuzzy bunny, he would buy a green dishwasher!
* Marty Meme knows Potsie personally.
* Marty Meme used to be available only in prescription strength.
* Marty Meme's favorite color: Pantone Black 1234.
* Marty Meme's goal in life: to travel through time and gather all the great geniuses who ever lived into one room, and then torture them!
* Marty Meme likes bacon because he foolishly thinks it's made from pigs.
* Marty Meme is turned on by women in gas masks.
* Marty Meme's dog Spot enjoys Jim Carrey, but not Howie Mandel, but can't remember which is which.
* Marty Meme has never thrown anything away in his entire life.
* Marty Meme is a frogman. A real one.
* Marty Meme has one red and one blue contact lens, so that real life will be 3-D!
* Marty Meme likes to buy distilled water and flush it down the toilet.
* Marty Meme is so important, he has a telex machine in his pool!
* Marty Meme is generic mutant.
* To debunk a myth, Marty Meme does not walk around all day in a Russian general's uniform. There is a difference between "Russian" and "Soviet".
* Marty Meme is under a doctor's care for hyperbozosity.
* Marty Meme killed Bob Crane... with kindness.
* Marty Meme can write upside down, under water, or on the Moon!
* All of Marty Meme's socks match... YOURS.
* As a child, Marty Meme thought Bob Hope was funny, because the TV told him so.
* Marty Meme is your sign of quality.
...with all due respect to James "Kibo" Parry
for reporters only
All guaranteed to be 100% true, or double your I.Q. back!
* Marty Meme thinks tomatoes are still poisonous.
* Marty Meme once sabotaged "Mr. Rogers' Neighborhood" by hijacking the trolley to Cuba.
* Marty Meme cures pattern baldness, but causes random baldness.
* If Marty Meme ever dies, he will be interred in Grant's Tomb.
* Marty Meme is the voice of Duke Nukem 3D. He was paid $1,000,000,000 to record lines like "Hail to the king, babby!" and "Your face, your ass, what's the difference?" and the one Duke only says at the end of the last level, "I wet 'em!"
* Marty Meme can fit two billiard balls in his mouth and still sing "Goldfinger" beautifully.
* Marty Meme was the one who told Chuck Jones, "You know, it would be funny if you changed him from a golf-playing frog to a singing, dancing frog."
* Marty Meme's Personal Identification Number is 1.
* Mosquitoes never bite Marty Meme.
* Marty Meme made his fortune in the seventies by inventing a handheld game that could play tic-tac-toe. It used a 2x2 grid of LEDs, and sold for $99.98. It could reliably beat any human being, although it took a minute to compute each move.
* Marty Meme's favorite NASA mission: Apollo 44D.
* Marty Meme was on "Star Trek" once as one of the evil space children. He's the one who's happy to be given _vanilla_ ice cream.
* Marty Meme lives in a one-room apartment with 450 cats, due to a wacky proviso in his eccentric uncle's will. Also it's haunted, or at least the will says so.
* Marty Meme was once kissed by Barbara Bain. He reported it to the police once he got off the subway.
* The Berlin Wall fell because Marty Meme accidentally broke it.
* Marty Meme buys all his food at K-Mart.
* Marty Meme likes pretzels that are stamped out and only look twisted.
* Marty Meme has no navel.
* Marty Meme inspired Pee-wee Herman... twice!
* Marty Meme can divide by 22 in his head.
* Marty Meme not only won World War III, he single-handedly covered it up!
* Marty Meme can type 120 factoids per minute.
* Marty Meme found babby Spot in a walnut.
* Marty Meme has ten toes. In a jar.
* Marty Meme once fell out of an airplane, landing on Andy Rooney! Only one of them suffered a brain injury.
* Many nations claim the Moon. Only Marty Meme claims the Moon bit him.
* Marty Meme gets financial advice from the ghost of Abraham Lincoln, who lives in a quarter with George Washington.
* When Marty Meme watches TV, the actors feel an eerie chill.
* Marty Meme is allergic to magma.
* Hanna-Barbera fired Marty Meme for having legs that moved independently.
* Marty Meme doesn't know the meaning of the word "meaning".
* Marty Meme is electromagnetically repulsive.
* Dean Martin only heard of Marty Meme last month.
* Don Martin used Marty Meme as a model for most of his characters.
* Doc Marten doesn't really have a doctorate, because Marty Meme got it instead.
* Dan Marino has never heard of Marty Meme, and never will.
* Marty Meme's favorite movie is "Paddle To The Sea".
* Marty Meme drinks over four thousand gallons of vodka PER CAPITA.
* Marty Meme doesn't catch the flu. He steals it.
* In a secret operation, the government gave Marty Meme one bionic leg, enabling him to run over a hundred miles per hour. The bionic surgery cost $1,000,000 plus $5,000,000 in batteries. Now he can crush tennis balls--without even touching them.
* Marty Meme was the first person to earn a PhD in the womb.
* Marty Meme weighs as much as a barracuda on the Moon.
* Marty Meme lives in a giant motorized Rubik's Cube left over from a World's Fair. His next home will be a giant hollow sphere, which he can roll around by walking up the walls, crushing all the other houses in the neighborhood.
* Marty Meme has had the hiccups for over 500 years!
* Marty Meme owns his own satellite. It was launched by accident and is filled with oatmeal. Watch out!
* Marty Meme keeps his ant farm inside a glass basketball, just for the fun of it. He shoots, he scores!
* Marty Meme's home has a self-destruct circuit.
* Marty Meme made up Albert Einstein.
* Marty Meme owns a tuxedo made of real penguin feathers.
* In Sweden, "Marty Meme" means "God of death" and is a popular brand of children's cigarettes.
* Marty Meme directed "Solar Crisis", starring Charlton Heston and Jack Palance.
* Marty Meme is white on the left side, black on the right side. He fights a never-ending battle with Frank Gorshin.
* Marty Meme has the world's second-largest Johnny Jump-Up!
* Marty Meme invented the Frappuchino by spilling a frappe on his chinos. His dog, Spot, took one lick and was addicted for life!
* Marty Meme's personal computer is a Coleco Adam.
* Marty Meme invented rippled cow chips.
* Marty Meme works out with Joe Piscopo.
* Marty Meme likes things and stuff. Spot likes things but not stuff.
* Marty Meme isn't "funny" funny. He is "not funny" funny.
* Marty Meme sleeps in a hyperbarbaric chamber.
* If Marty Meme were a fuzzy bunny, he would buy a green dishwasher!
* Marty Meme knows Potsie personally.
* Marty Meme used to be available only in prescription strength.
* Marty Meme's favorite color: Pantone Black 1234.
* Marty Meme's goal in life: to travel through time and gather all the great geniuses who ever lived into one room, and then torture them!
* Marty Meme likes bacon because he foolishly thinks it's made from pigs.
* Marty Meme is turned on by women in gas masks.
* Marty Meme's dog Spot enjoys Jim Carrey, but not Howie Mandel, but can't remember which is which.
* Marty Meme has never thrown anything away in his entire life.
* Marty Meme is a frogman. A real one.
* Marty Meme has one red and one blue contact lens, so that real life will be 3-D!
* Marty Meme likes to buy distilled water and flush it down the toilet.
* Marty Meme is so important, he has a telex machine in his pool!
* Marty Meme is generic mutant.
* To debunk a myth, Marty Meme does not walk around all day in a Russian general's uniform. There is a difference between "Russian" and "Soviet".
* Marty Meme is under a doctor's care for hyperbozosity.
* Marty Meme killed Bob Crane... with kindness.
* Marty Meme can write upside down, under water, or on the Moon!
* All of Marty Meme's socks match... YOURS.
* As a child, Marty Meme thought Bob Hope was funny, because the TV told him so.
* Marty Meme is your sign of quality.
...with all due respect to James "Kibo" Parry
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Tom Flapwell
- Posts:5465
- Joined:Wed Feb 23, 2005 1:48 pm
- Location:DC
- Contact:
You forgot: Marty Meme beat up Chuck Norris.
See other much-maligned creatures in my webcomic: http://downscale.comicgenesis.com
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Baconsticks
- Posts:2055
- Joined:Fri Jan 18, 2008 10:57 pm
- Location:Two Days To Last Thursday
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Hanging Tree
- Posts:317
- Joined:Mon Oct 22, 2007 10:35 pm
No he didn't. Marty Meme is above ridiculous psuedo-pop-cult referencing of outmoded and forgettable martial arts actors.
If retiring as an undefeated champion and being the first ninth degree black belt in the western hemisphere are forgettable feats I would like to know what martial artists you do remember.
Round the hangin tree
Swayin in the breeze
In the summer sun
As we two are one
Swayin
Swayin in the breeze
In the summer sun
As we two are one
Swayin
I remember none, as those feats mean nothing to me.No he didn't. Marty Meme is above ridiculous psuedo-pop-cult referencing of outmoded and forgettable martial arts actors.
If retiring as an undefeated champion and being the first ninth degree black belt in the western hemisphere are forgettable feats I would like to know what martial artists you do remember.
Jackie Chan.No he didn't. Marty Meme is above ridiculous psuedo-pop-cult referencing of outmoded and forgettable martial arts actors.
If retiring as an undefeated champion and being the first ninth degree black belt in the western hemisphere are forgettable feats I would like to know what martial artists you do remember.
If you've never sat with a group of drunken Germans you've just met that night and discussed where Jackie Chan should fight in his next movie (personal favourite being a sex shop or a swimming pool with slides, diving boards and other such toys) you haven't lived.
Thither
CHUCK NORRISâ„¢: KARATE KOMMANDOSâ„¢
(for the 3 or 4 people who are yet to see this)
I wanted his next fight to be on the Eiffel Tower, and it was, so I was happy. Now, I want his next fight to be in an abandoned foundry, which during the course of the fight somehow becomes "reactivated"... the fight would require him to dodge waterfalls of melted steel, and he'd use the various rods and bolts being produced by the foundry as WEAPONS!!!Jackie Chan.No he didn't. Marty Meme is above ridiculous psuedo-pop-cult referencing of outmoded and forgettable martial arts actors.
If retiring as an undefeated champion and being the first ninth degree black belt in the western hemisphere are forgettable feats I would like to know what martial artists you do remember.
If you've never sat with a group of drunken Germans you've just met that night and discussed where Jackie Chan should fight in his next movie (personal favourite being a sex shop or a swimming pool with slides, diving boards and other such toys) you haven't lived.
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