Define Cynical Fan Forums

Posted: **Tue May 30, 2006 8:47 pm**

Don't wear a suit on the day your going to wash dogs

Posted: **Tue May 30, 2006 10:42 pm**

Gasoline eats Styrofoam very very quickly!

Posted: **Tue May 30, 2006 11:47 pm**

Don't spontaneously combust.

Posted: **Wed May 31, 2006 1:00 am**

Never pour grease that has come off a bacon into a plastic cup (unless you want a cool result)

Posted: **Wed May 31, 2006 1:00 am**

Don't play poker or pool against anyone whose nickname is the same as the name of a city or country.

Posted: **Wed May 31, 2006 2:47 am**

EDIT: would you look at that? My 1000th post and I still feel like a newb. I want to say I'm sorry for posting far too often. I just have no other life.
Have you seen my post count? I joined AFTER you and I have a higher count (and PPD)

Check the weather from more than one source before you get dressed.

And I've been here since January 2004 and just went above the 1,000 mark yesterday.

Advice: Always use the word "oozy" in your 1,000th post.

Posted: **Thu Jun 01, 2006 12:44 am**

One of the cardinal rules of life is never call that chess piece a cardinal.

Posted: **Thu Jun 01, 2006 1:36 pm**

This morning I saw a blogger call it "ironic" that someone just lost the National Spelling Bee on the word "nadir."

My advice: Don't use "ironic" or related terms ironically.

Posted: **Thu Jun 01, 2006 2:42 pm**

Have lunch before your driving lesson.

(DAMN I'm hungry!)

Posted: **Thu Jun 01, 2006 4:17 pm**

Don't skip a class when you have a concience.

Posted: **Thu Jun 01, 2006 9:12 pm**

If you don't go to other people's funerals, they won't come to yours.

Posted: **Thu Jun 01, 2006 10:21 pm**

If you don't go to other people's funerals, they won't come to yours.

If I went to someone funeral and then they came to mine I would be disturbed for to reason.
1. THEY DIED FIRST HOW ARE THEY THEIR!
2. how do I know who is at my funeral...I"M DEAD!

Posted: **Fri Jun 02, 2006 12:43 am**

Implausibility and confusion: they work for me and they can work for you too.

Posted: **Fri Jun 02, 2006 1:38 am**

Don't smack your head really reailly hard into a computer monitor. Whilst at first it may appear amusing, it is in fact very dangerous.

Posted: **Fri Jun 02, 2006 2:10 am**

The day before your birthday is a great day for extreme luck in table tennis.

Define Cynical Fan Forums

If you had advice to give at this moment...